On loving ourselves, our body, each other.

I just read this. An open letter to Kate, Duchess of Cambridge. In it, the author apologized for the way we, as a society, judge a woman's body, and how proud she was to see Kate, as a brand-new, day-old mom standing in the spotlight holding her firstborn and glowing with mommy love. And wearing a dress that didn't quite conceal her brand-new, day-old mom belly. And the author apologized, because she knows what nine months will do to a body. How everything will be shaped and stretched until it's barely recognizable, then you will bring a new life into the world, and promptly be judged for what your body does naturally when conceiving a child.

I'm not a mom yet. I dream of days playing with my husband's and my children, rocking them to sleep, the kind of parents we'll be and the not-so-perfect days. And I am so happy to know women are joining together and praising the way the body looks. I struggle enough with the way my body is, and I'm the only one changing it! I look at my girlfriends, and think, 'girl, you could totally lose a few more pounds. You're a mom, for goodness sakes! You should be able to play with your kids and drop those extra pounds!' My mean self is a complete snob. It's true. I judge more than I love sometimes, and I am completely ashamed to admit it. I don't pour Christ's love out like I should.

As a photographer, what use am I to anyone if I'm just going to be sizing them up? My job is to make them feel as beautiful as they actually look. As women we have a hard time seeing it. I've completely lost count of how many times I myself have looked a woman up and down and thought to myself, 'If only I had her stomach/boobs/legs/hair/ ect.' I'm not helping myself any, and I'm not helping those around me.

Our God wants us clothed in dignity, not beautiful clothes. He wants us to be kind, not fashionable. He wants us to love, not obsess over what we're wearing that day. He wants us to spend time with him, not hours primping every morning.

Ladies, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for judging you. And I'm sorry for judging myself. 

Some days are better than others, but I'm realizing God has put each of us here, just the way we are, for a reason. Our hair colour doesn't matter. The size of our bra doesn't matter. The fact we look better in red than blue has no affect on our salvation.

That is not to say we can't wear nice clothes, or style our hair, or check out the latest trends on Pintrest. But if that is our life, if that's all we do or think about or love, we're not living as we should.

I'm grateful for a husband who loves me, exactly the way I am. Even on days when I put myself down, or am unkind, or whine when I don't get my way. He is my greatest helper when I feel not good enough. He tells me my photographs could be published, he tells me the girls on the tv don't compare, and he's willing to go on crazy adventures with me.

Girls, I'm praying for you, for me, for us. We are what keeps hate in a circle. Few men really care what we're wearing as much as we think they do. I read once that women dress for themselves and for other women. We they dressed for men, we'd go around naked.

You know that scarf you love? Wear it. Those earrings that bring out the blue in your eyes? Put them on. That dress that makes you feel like a 50's bombshell and is actually long enough but shows the c

urve of the stomach you're trying to hide? Wear it like you'll never own another dress.

Ladies, let's love ourselves. Our God made us, so He thinks we're perfect. Our husbands married us, and they likely wouldn't have if they found us unattractive. We looks like our parents, so they probably shouldn't complain about our looks. And our siblings probably don't care. And if you're not married yet, don't fret.

You. Are. Beautiful. 

love, Steph

PS.My husband took this photo during a shooting tutorial. I can't explain how much I love it. Yes, I was dressed up on purpose (honestly, not even sure why I own red lipstick!). Yes, it's posed. But it makes me feel beautiful. I was freezing, and absolutely not wearing enough clothes for April. But my husband put it up as his desktop background ages ago, and refuses to take it down. :)